Say it with me…. LOVE does NOT hurt….
If women can embody this catalytic pearl of wisdom we will cease the allowance of domestic abuse & violence, set a sacred love standard, walk away, stop engaging, and change the statistic from 1 in 4 women to NONE.
I am deeply passionate about this issue. Its personal for me. Not just because I survived psychological & emotional abuse in childhood, but also spiritual abuse when I perpetuated the cycle in my personal life as a young women. Until I woke up, took responsibility for my childhood wounding and started a conscious healing journey with the assistance of various catalytic therapists, psychologists and metaphysical teachers.
This awakening healing was embodied in the sacred knowledge that Love does NOT hurt… Knowing that if I allow the abuse to continue… because at the core of it I am desperate to hear the words “I Love you” … then I too am abusing myself.
Too often women hold unto crumbs of loving… staying blinded to the violation, assaults on the emotional, physical, mental and spiritual body…this is a high cost to pay for feeling “loved”…
The truth is dear heart… If he truly loved you, he wouldn’t be hurting you. And more importantly, if you truly loved yourself, you wouldn’t allow anything less than true love…
Say it with me… Love does not hurt…
The truth is… women have forgotten what their rights are…
- Your Human Right is to be treated with respect, dignity and to be safe….
- Your Divine Right is that you are worth loving simply because you exist.. you do not have to earn this right…
- Your Wom(b)en’s Right is to be honoured for being the nurturer, life giver; the creative, intuitive, beautiful, powerful connector, which holds the family and community together…
The biggest contributing factor which I have experienced and observed in my counseling practice is the “frog in slow heating water” syndrome.
Toxic, co-dependent relationships becomes the norm. I had to learn what Love truly is, how it feels, what it looks like in behaviour. It was foreign to me… almost unbelievable- too good to be true…
Love is a devotion…. Love is kind, compassionate, respectful, empowering, supportive, uplifting, safely vulnerable, freeing…
If you do not feel free in your relationships, start paying attention and re-evaluate. The kind of freedom I am talking about is
- feeling free to express your authentic self,
- feeling free to discuss your dreams and fears,
- feeling free to voice your truth and differing opinions,
- free to expand and grow,
- free to express your emotions,
- free to vulnerably connect in times of struggle…
I think women’s Achilles heel is “seeing potential”. I too was stuck in this space of holding out for the fulfillment of potential. What I realised is that this “potential” was aligned with thinking you can save or rescue your partner, that you can change him with some TLC, that with some support, guidance,and love he’ll be as right as rain.
I’ve heard countless women say to me:
“Shame, he had a rough childhood”;
“He is this way because his X was a psycho”;
“He doesn’t trust women and is controlling because his mother abandoned him when he was little”; or
“He is this way because he was a warlord in his previous life”.
I’ve heard it all. We all have childhood scars, we know how this pain impacted us. It is up to us to take responsibility for this wounding, to feel it, deal with and heal it! Its up to us to stop the cycle.
Ultimately this ‘potential” motivation for staying engaged in the relationship activates the shadow aspect of the Mother archetype within us, and soon we realise we do not want to mother our partners, we want a Divine Masculine man.
You are a beautiful, unique expression of the Divine Feminine and you are enough!
Say it with me … Love is a devotion… Love Heals…
I am so passionate about catalysing a movement of epic proportions in changing this culture and its consequent statistic (1 in 4 women are in abusive relationships) that I have devoted many years learning about all the aspects which affect and impact this cycle. Abusive relationships is experienced by women across all socioeconomic spheres, all ethnic groups, in all countries, at all ages.
The affects can last a lifetime…unless we start talking about it, and shifting from shame to igniting a thrivalution. I have developed a prevention training model for girls leadership, which I plan to launch in due course.
Say it with me … Love is a devotion… True Love is the most powerful healing force there is in this world… Love Heals…
When we start balancing our archetypes which affect our relationships we step into whole-heartedness. The archetypes which can assist us to embody these pearls are
- Aphrodite, the goddess of love, beauty, sensuality, embracing all aspects of love
- Demeter, the Mother goddess of nurturing, meaningfulness and sacred purpose
- Artemis, the goddess of focus and freedom in relationships
- Sekhmet, the lioness goddess which helps us to have fierce boundaries as we alchemize the wounds
- Hera, the goddess of sacred marriage and union, assisting us to choose harmonious, resonant union in partnership instead of settling
Love heals…Embody it… sing it… art journal it… voice it….practice it… Be Love!